It's 5:30 AM. At 8:30 this morning, I have a consultation with a thyroid guy at Columbia University Medical Center (or whatever that medical center is called). From his resume, the guy looks to be exactly my age, which is a little odd, but he seems to be an expert in thyroids and the endocrine system.
This morning I've been worried about it being in my lymph nodes elsewhere, although I -
YIKES! Watching the news and a wave (sent via Hurricane Bill) swept three people out to sea - I just typed "see" - a little girl died and two were rescued. The wave was in Southwest Harbor, Maine, at a platform in Acadia National Park. We always stay right near Southwest Harbor when we go!! We've never been there this early in the season, though. Well, I have been there as early as July, but not Jim. Is this perspective-giving? Yes. Am I extremely open to perspective at the moment? Not extremely. Perhaps just somewhat.
Anyway, yeah, this morning I've been worried about cancer being everywhere. I'm not sure how I got this idea in my head. I guess maybe that's just what happens when you mix cancer with a paranoid/anxious person who is up suddenly, and too early.
So I have to remember to ask the doctor this morning how they can make sure it's not everywhere.
Also, what Jim and I call my "brain worm" has been super-insidious lately (meaning I can't remember shit from moment to moment). I forgot what cerignola olives were called for nearly 24 hours until I looked it up with a Google search on "what are those big Italian olives with the pits called." I'm going to hope that effect is produced by anxiety.
Also, I've had pain in my body elsewhere, corresponding with lymph node locations. Also, that other pain I mentioned is still hanging around, too.
I just coughed and it hurt my neck.
Can't wait to get coffee and stop the progression of the paranoia.
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